Squidward is an aristocratic gay black man who vogues old way because he’s cultured, Spongebob is a twink from the Dominican Republic, Patrick is an anglo saxon bear who doesn’t wash after the gym
[two tumblr soldiers bleeding out on the internet frontlines]
“heh… remember strawbebby…. And ranibow spramkle… always made me laugh”
“Don’t talk like that man. We’re gonna get out of here i prommy.” [mortar fire sails overhead and land nearby] “christ its like a childrens hospital out there”
[through shallow breaths] “I always loved…… the color of the sky…………”
Me: *strapped to a chair in a cold interrogation room with a middle aged man pacing back and forth*
Him: *projects a picture of Sam and Frodo on to the wall* What is their relationship?
Me: Their ship is valid and very cute, but we should also consider the idea that their admiration and respect for one another is a deep, platonic bond. Love doesn’t always have to be romantic, and it is important for men to be able to express their platonic care for one another in a way that toxic masculinity doesn’t currently allow.
Him: Okay *projects a picture of Legolas and Gimli* what’s their relatio-
